Ju young's Blog

It's been a really frustrating day.  I looked over my Grace list and I thought, "Man, it's impossible to think of any today..."  But then I thought maybe this is the kind of day that reflecting on my graces is more vital than on a day where graces come easily.

I've always had things about my body that I didn't like.  I'm sure most of the girls do.  One of the huge complexes I had was my belly button.  I have a gigantic (or so I think, my husband disagrees with me...) crater for a belly button. 

OK, so I really do need to take pictures of me at week 16 this weekend.  I haven't taken pictures since week 13 I think.  But in the last week or so, I've grown visibly, so I would like to document it. :)  It's been pretty windy/cold/rainy/stormy out for the last week, so I haven't been able to plant my strawberries, which has been the biggest bummer of the week.  Tomatoes are still doing well, and I've kept the banana pepper plant inside, as it is very small and fragile-looking, and with the Oklahoma wind, well, I don't want it to get swept away. 

Grace:

1. Wonderful in-laws that I get along with, who live close to us.  I can't have my family, but at least we can be with Kris' family!  I see a lot of people who don't get along with their in-laws - I'm graced with ones that I love.
2. Skype, the most wonderful technology ever developed.
3. Breakfast.  Omelette & hash browns, with lots of ketchup.
4. My husband, who has (seemingly) infinite patience when it comes to dealing with me.
5. Lemon drops, that my mother in law picks up for me at truck stops.  They're the BEST.  I'm willing to share. :)

Grace:

1. Fights.  It forces you to be honest and come to terms with whatever is going on, and whatever needs fixin'.
2. Tears.  There's nothing more honest than tears sometimes.
3. Flat sodas.  I so do love flat sodas.  It's a good thing they come carbonated - I'd drink them a lot more often if they weren't.
4. Fuzzy house shoes.  I love keeping my feet warm when the weather is chilly.
5. My husband, who lends me his shoulders to cry on even when we are having a fight.

So I was reading someone's blog...  I'm not a stalker, but I find that some people's blogs are just fun and insightful to read.  I think blogs can be therapeutic, just releasing your emotions and thoughts and such into writing, in the void of the internet.  Anyway.  This person has started listing 5 things that has graced your life that day, for the next year.  I can't guarantee that I will do this everyday... But when I do, I'd like to include it in my blogs.

OK, so my pants have shrunk about a size and a half when I washed it last.  (who am I kidding?...)  Apparently since the time I washed the pants and now, my belly has grown enough that I can no longer button these pants.  (or I have eaten too many donuts.  Either way, I can no longer button them.)  Sigh.  I feel and look SO pregnant today.  Which is a good thing.  But it's still depressing to have pants not fit anymore.

Today I'm 15 weeks!

The passing of each week has never meant more for me than during this pregnancy.  When I would ask "How far along are you?" to a pregnant women, they would always answer in weeks, and I used to wonder why they did that.  Pregnancy is 10 months, so I wanted to know in months.  Well, that's just not so when you're actually pregnant.  Every week is such a milestone, that's the only way I can count the progress of pregnancy.  Pregnancy is actually 40 weeks. :)  I'm sure I'll feel the same way when I have a baby, I will probably count the passing of time in weeks or months, instead of years.

Today has been a good day.  We went to our monthly checkup - FINALLY! - and heard the baby's heartbeat.  What a relief!  151 bpm.  After being anxious for almost a month, it was so good to know that Baby V is okay in there. 

So, I'm 14 weeks tomorrow.  I've been a little paranoid lately, especially yesterday, when I felt distinctly "un-pregnant".  Kris says I will have plenty of days later when I will feel plenty pregnant, but it's disconcerting to feel un-pregnant, and your reflection in the mirror all of a sudden has a smaller bump.  (it's like something has deflated...)  I also had very minor, dull ache in my right kidney area this morning when I woke up, so I've been trying to drink plenty of water.  I secretly wanted to call the doctor today because of it (darn the pain, it went away), thinking maybe if I went in today I would be able to hear the heartbeat of Baby V.  But I resisted the urge.  Now I have about a week of waiting till I can be sure that the baby is okay.