32 Weeks!  It's insane.  Really.  I can't believe I'm at 32 weeks.  I never thought I'd get here!  2 weeks more and we're at the "the baby will not have permanent disabilities" point.  We're pretty stoked about getting close to that mark.

Some days, if I didn't believe that God was in control, in good or bad things, I would just scream, get in the car, and drive all the way down to Mexico and stay there.  For real.

So, I try to keep up with our constantly changing world.  It's a very hard thing to do, but I spend so much time on a computer as it is, I try to set aside a little time (at least once a week if not more often) to bring myself up to date on things that interest me besides the web and technology.  Those things often include the state of matters in North/South Korea, and American politics.   Now Ju hates politics, and this is quite understandable, it's a dirty business with so many moving components as to make any political stance debatable by the opposing side.  In essence, there's never a "correct" answer, and this is, and should be, infuriating to all peoples on some level.

I had a long conversation on Skype with my mom yesterday.  Skype is a wonderful thing, it's quite bizarre to think that when I was in high school dorm, I spoke to my parents maybe once a month.  Then, they got a satellite phone, and I could call them if I had anything urgent, and I thought that was absolutely amazing.  Then, they moved to Jakarta, and I could call them with my phone card whenever I wanted.  And now, with Skype, we can talk as long as we want, as long as their internet permits.  My mom marvels at it as well, especially with the video on.  Technology has done wonders for communication.

Anyway.  I had a baby sister die when I was about two.  Koreans don't talk about miscarriages and stuff much – it's not as talked about as it is here.  So, all I knew about it was, that mom had lost an almost full term baby, and I was under the impression that she was still born.  Sometimes I wondered why she had died in the womb, what had gone wrong.  Talking to my mom about my early dilation and being careful, the subject of her came up.  It was the first time we had ever really talked about it in depth...  Turns out, the baby was not still born.  Turns out, the baby wasn't almost full term, she was full term.

I hate politics.  I really do.  I know politics run pretty much all aspects of our lives, but I hate it.  We all have our opinions, and if you don't agree with mine, chances are, you never will, and there's really no point in "arguing" or "discussing" or whatever.  But I just read a blog about health care, and I thought I'd organize my thoughts a bit.  And if you don't agree, well, it's MY blog, so :P to you. :)  This blog was posted by someone on Facebook about Private versus NHS (which I assume, stands for National Health Service).  Link is here: http://potentialandexpectations.wordpress.com/2009/08/13/this-americans-experience-of-britains-healthcare-system/

How far along?  31 Weeks.  A wee bit over 7 months!
Total weight gain/loss:  Not sure, I gained about a pound in two weeks last time.  I think I was up about 25 pounds?  Which is quite depressing, it's the lower “recommended” weight gain number.  Sigh.
Maternity clothes?  Yep.
Stretch marks?  I'm sure I have a bunch of new ones on my butt.
Sleep:  Still pretty good, I wake up a lot, but when I'm asleep, I sleep very deeply.  I don't wake up when Kris gets out of bed, which is VERY unusual.
Best moment this week:  No change in dilation!  The doctor checked me out and I'm stable, so she's gonna hold off on the medication.  Also, got to see the baby on the ultrasound, some hair already. :)  And the baby's head down, in right position.
Movement:  Every day, especially when I sit and have my feet up.  Hiccups too!
Food cravings:  Not much.  Just hungry real often.
Gender:  Not sure / not telling. :)
Labor Signs:  Braxton Hicks still, but it's really slowed down.  Thank the Lord.
Belly Button in or out? Flat.  The upper edge is starting to bump out a little.
What I miss:  Not feeling so cumbersome when I get up and down.  Getting up from laying/sitting is proving to be a lot of work at this point.  Oh, and I think I've done my last toenail painting until I have the baby.  I'll have to get Kris to do it, or get a pedicure. :)
What I am looking forward to:  Getting the nursery painted – my brother's here to help, so I'm pretty confident it will get done sometime in the next two weeks!
Weekly Wisdom:  Get comfy whenever you can, and take it easy.  Standing up too long and getting stuff done, is not good for the swollen feet, or the cankles.
Milestones:  Can't see my toes when I look straight down.

Yep, falling behind again.  Although, last week, it wasn't because there wasn't anything significant.  I've been...  anxious, stressed, and nervous for about a whole week now.  Went to the Doctor last Wednesday to get checked up, and she wanted to make sure to do some physical tests just in case Kris and I were going to Paris for DrupalCon.

"Oh my."  Is what she said.  "Uh-oh", is what went through my head then.  Oh my just can't be good when she's down there, feeling my parts.  As it turns out, it wasn't good - I was 1 cm dilated already, and my cervix was 25% thinner ("effaced" I think).  She said definitely "no" to Paris at this point, and was even considering putting me on bed rest, with medication.  She thinks when I had Braxton Hicks all day long, it may have dilated me.  So next time I have more than 5-6 an hour, I'm to run to the hospital to get checked out.  And she probably will start me on medication...  Brethine, which apparently makes you miserable, and progesterone shots.

Somehow I'm falling behind these surveys.  A part of it, I think, is that the weeks are now more blurred, while as at the beginning, I counted every day going by.  I think I feel more secure in the pregnancy now, so I obsess less about the passage of each week.  Good in a way, I think.

Past couple weekends have been busy.  Two weekends ago we were in Arkansas for Grandpa Cole's 80th birthday.  He's doing alright, and Grandma looked okay too.  Her arm, that she injured a while back (she had to get 17 stiches for a cut she got from falling on a broken glass bowl), looked awful, but it also seemed to be healing nicely.  Grandpa didn't feel up to going out, so the whole family got together and made roast for dinner, and it was absolutely delish!  Got a wonderful spinach salad dressing recipe from Grandma, and stuffed me and the baby with tons of food. :)

Skipped last week...  I'm sure the baby won't mind though. :)

How far along?  25 weeks
Total weight gain/loss:  Prolly up around 20 pounds.  Especially after the ginormous Mexican meal I had a couple of hours ago.  Really really good beef chimichanga.  Mmm.  At least I won't be hungry when I go to bed! :D

23 weeks.  That's like...  Over 5 months!  Holy cow.  It's just absolutely crazy.  In about 4 months, we'll be having this baby and our lives will turn up side down.

These days Kris and I have been SO busy at the office.  So stressed.  Things are a little tough, as it probably is for everyone else.  It is discouraging, and we have our down times...  But I have to be completely honest with myself - when I lay down, put my hands on my belly, and feel the baby move, it really does make things so much better.  It can get me more anxious, worrying about what the future holds for the baby and our family, but the little movements and kicks can absolutely make my day.  It never gets old.  Probably never will.